Sunday, 26 July 2015

LIFE STORIES #11 - PEOPLE

PEOPLE

People are of varying kinds. There are people who complain, or who sacrifice, who cry about things or people who laugh about them. But a common thing found in human behaviour is being hypocritical. 

There is no point in denying it – we all are hypocrites when it comes to particular topics or times. A common example: we always complain about people around us being mean, inconsiderate, and that they forget about us in a couple of days. But we ourselves forget that we do the same.

I had a very, very close friend who shifted to a hostel in a different state all together, and this happened extremely fast, not giving the two of us enough time to digest the news. She had gone even before I had accepted the fact that she was leaving. I still remember that day – her last day with us, her farewell party. We sat in a room together and cried for over an hour. 
But now, after only a year or so, I don’t miss her so much. And I’m disgusted with myself for not missing her. I remember those promises we made to each other, saying we’ll stay in touch, talk every day. But none of those promises held out for more than a week, and I guess it’s both of ours fault.

I always gave her the benefit of the doubt. “She must be busy”, “she must have no phone connection there”, “and she might be trying to make friends” were a few of the excuses I gave to myself on her behalf. But I was tired too. 

Our friendship became extremely one sided, with only me trying to get in touch with her. But somewhere in the middle of all of this realised that I had done way too much for that girl, and the next possible thing to do was to just stop, and leave her alone and see whether she even needed me anymore. 

I walked away. 
It wasn’t as if I was giving up, or losing hope. 
I just had to draw the differentiating line between determination and desperation. 
Because I believe that what is meant to be yours will always come back to you – it just takes time. 

If our friendship was to last, she will make an effort too.

It’s not as though this write up is going to end happily because you know what?

She never did.


And something I wish I hadn’t done was that neither did I.

- Ragini Zutshi Anand

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